Friday, May 22, 2015

A Pig's Life

' I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.'
-- Sir Winston Churchill

From Mistress Trixie's Tumblr Blog :

A pig’s orgasm lasts 30 minutes ( O.M.G. ! ). 

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death ( creepy, but I’m still not over the pig ). The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body -- she initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off ( hi honey, I’m home... ). The flea can jump 350 times its body length -- which compares to a human jumping the length of seven football fields. Thirty convulsing squealing minutes -- lucky fucking pig ! Can you imagine? The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds ( what's so tasty to a bottom feeder ? ). Some lions mate over 50 times a day, but I still wish I was a pig. Butterflies taste with their feet. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. A cat’s urine glows under a black light. An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain. Starfish have no brains. Polar bears are left-handed. Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. What about that fucking lucky pig ? Do the dolphins know about the pig ? Long live the pig -- oink oink !

To which I offer my humble response :

I always wanted to be the lion and feast anywhere, anytime. But the inescapable reality is that I am a pig. Certified and proud. A beggarly beast. A hungry suckling piglet. A gluttonous grunting hog. A slurping slobbering swine. A wild ravenous boar. A perverted porker. You can call me Oinky.

Quite simply, licking and slurping and sucking her delicious juicy pussy is in itself an exquisite cerebral orgasm -- and always lasts longer than thirty minutes.

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