Sunday, May 31, 2015

Box Lunch

Diddle yourself with all manner of fruits and vegetables -- then feed me. Corn on the cob, stiff carrots and mini-carrots, shiny plump cucumbers, bananas with the skin peeled back, giant zucchini, ripe berries, smooth plums, juicy peaches -- all dipped in your tasty sweet cunt sauce, to be eagerly sucked and slurped and tasted and swallowed !

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Heavenly Moments

When you message me and tell that you need to be eaten.
When you raise your skirt and remove your panties.
When you lay back and spread your thighs and offer me your gorgeous glorious pussy.
When I inhale the intoxicating musky aroma of your hot juicy cunt.
When you command me to hungrily lick and flick your clit until you cum all over my face.
When my hungry tongue slides between your succulent plump lips.
When I savour the exquisite taste of your sweet oozing juice.
When you cradle my head and pull my ravenous tongue harder on your aching throbbing clit.
When you squeal and squirm and convulse -- and bless me with your excruciating orgasms.
When you gush your sacred essence onto my eager outstretched tongue.
And when I swallow, the ultimate thrill.

Friday, May 22, 2015

A Pig's Life

' I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.'
-- Sir Winston Churchill

From Mistress Trixie's Tumblr Blog :

A pig’s orgasm lasts 30 minutes ( O.M.G. ! ). 

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death ( creepy, but I’m still not over the pig ). The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body -- she initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off ( hi honey, I’m home... ). The flea can jump 350 times its body length -- which compares to a human jumping the length of seven football fields. Thirty convulsing squealing minutes -- lucky fucking pig ! Can you imagine? The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds ( what's so tasty to a bottom feeder ? ). Some lions mate over 50 times a day, but I still wish I was a pig. Butterflies taste with their feet. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. A cat’s urine glows under a black light. An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain. Starfish have no brains. Polar bears are left-handed. Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. What about that fucking lucky pig ? Do the dolphins know about the pig ? Long live the pig -- oink oink !

To which I offer my humble response :

I always wanted to be the lion and feast anywhere, anytime. But the inescapable reality is that I am a pig. Certified and proud. A beggarly beast. A hungry suckling piglet. A gluttonous grunting hog. A slurping slobbering swine. A wild ravenous boar. A perverted porker. You can call me Oinky.

Quite simply, licking and slurping and sucking her delicious juicy pussy is in itself an exquisite cerebral orgasm -- and always lasts longer than thirty minutes.

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Days of Old

in days of old when girls were bold

and reached the age for dicking

they spread their thighs and closed their eyes

and revelled in the licking

Wednesday, May 20, 2015


a voluptuous lady named Doris

sings in the neighbourhood chorus

whenever we meet, I kneel at her feet

and suck her magnificent clitoris

Cunnilingus Credentials

In response to your desire for an eager hungry tongue slave to kneel at your feet and constantly beg to worship the holy grail of your womanhood, I humbly offer my credentials for your consideration.

Friday, May 15, 2015

The Pussy Worshipper's Ode to Summer

'...finger pies in summer...'
-- Penny Lane, The Beatles

it's summertime, the livin's easy
I'm on my knees and actin' sleazy
the weather's hot and oh so sticky
yeah now's the time for kitty licky
your pussy's hot and drippin' sweaty
and smells so good like cunt spaghetti
your peach is ripe, your juice is oozin'
my hungry tongue is softly cruisin'
let me lick your luscious cunny
and taste your sacred yummy honey
please offer me your cheeky bum
to tickle with my tireless tongue
and when you cum and squeal and gush
I'll gulp it down like a drunken lush