Sunday, February 26, 2017

Delicious Fantasies

Rubenesque woman. You're pleasantly plump and so is your pussy. Juicy meaty pouty labia, so perfect for sucking and slurping.

Squirting. You love to gush or squirt into my open hungry mouth. Your joy juice is warm and tasty and it's a huge thrill to swallow every drop.

Clit sucking. Your aching swollen girl pearl and my strong lips are a perfect match. However you like it, for as long as you want.

Woman of colour. The darker the berry, the sweeter the juice. An insatiable appetite for being licked, slurped and sucked -- and cumming.

Multi-O. You're the Energizer cum bunny and your orgasms are my greatest thrill. You beg me not to stop and just keep cumming and cumming and cumming.

Analingus. Your puckered starfish loves to be licked, slurped and tongue fucked, while you diddle or vibe your aching clit.

Tongue 'n toy joy. Various combinations of tongue and toys to simultaneously stimulate all your sweet spots for extra intense pleasure.

Sybian machine. Your clit and g-spot are at the mercy of the machine and my tongue feasts on your spasming asshole.  

Double delight. G-spot finger massage while I lick your pussy and suck your clit.

Dualingus. A threesome with two tireless insatiable tongues gorging together on your pussy and asshole.

Tongue riding. Ride my tongue, grind my face, give me juice to slurp and taste. Hold my head still, dance on my tongue, feed me.

Cunnilingus. It's the only way you can cum and you crave a ravenous tongue, like mine.

Hot and sweaty. After a workout or yoga on a hot day and your pussy is ripe with that exquisite intoxicating fragrance that turns my knees to jelly.

Libido. The epicentre of your femininity insists that I go down on you at every opportunity.

Juicy. An endless supply of your slick honey-sweet nectar oozes all over my face and onto my slurping tongue and down my throat.

Lickathon. I dream of the endless feast and a needy greedy pussy that says there's no such thing as too much tongue.

Mature. You're an elegant lady on the street and a demanding pillow princess in the bedroom.

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

V Day

Vagina Day or Vulva Day, your choice.

A day for women everywhere to surrender the holy grail of womanhood to kneeling adoring worshippers and tireless insatiable tongues. A day on which the most beautiful work of art ever created is viewed with awe and reverence and praised in poems and songs. A day that celebrates the blissful union of the human mouth and female vulva. A day on which vagina worshippers are rewarded for their adoring passion with copious amounts of Goddess nectar and joy juice. Celebrate V-Day with the feast of Saint Lickalot, orgasmic communion, and the incredible thrill of tasting and swallowing her sacred essence.

Sunday, October 09, 2016

Thanksgiving Feast

Traditionally, people tend to over-indulge at the big feast of plenty. No turkey for me though -- I just wanna pig-out on your yummy plump pussy and swallow every drop of your tasty joy juice. White or dark meat, love it all. Wanna feed me, for an hour or two ?

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Wanna Play Pussy Scrabble ?

If I beat you, I eat you. If you win, you can straddle my face, ride my tireless tongue with your pussy and ass, and squirt your tasty joy juice down my throat. 

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Cuntoholics Unanimous

My name is Peter and I’m a cuntoholic. Happily, my addiction is incurable but I need to be fed frequently and generously. Fresh juicy cunt is not to be found at meat markets or grocery stores or farmers’ markets or delicatessens or food banks, and I’m ravenously hungry, desperately famished. Pussy is not on the menu at Wendy’s or Burger Queen or Tasty Taco or Starfucks or Hot Box Lunch or Chick-fil-A or Pink Lobster or Cuntry Style Muffins or Clam Jam or Finger Lickin’ Chicken or Peach Pie Paradise or Smorgassbord Slurpfest or Schnitz N Tits. Surely I thought, Asian establishments would offer what I crave – but no luck at Sum Yung Slit or Chow Mein Snatch or Happy Lucky Noodle or All You Can Eat Poontang Buffet or Yummy Cummy Dumpling or Juicy Lucy Sushi. 

So dear readers, who will feed me ?

Sunday, June 19, 2016

Final Oral Exams

Seeking 12 libidinous pussy-proud women to attest to my general proficiency in eating pussy – the final step in achieving my cunnilingus credentials. Please be ready to submit to a minimum of one hour of thorough and satisfactory pleasuring in order to complete your detailed report.

Tuesday, May 31, 2016

The Great Canadian Beaver Eating Contest

This contest is open to anyone with a hot juicy pussy. The winner is whomever withstands the longest period of continuous vigorous tongue lashing courtesy of my tireless insatiable tongue, before collapsing into an orgasm-induced coma. Cash prizes to be announced. Who's down for the challenge ?


Sunday, May 15, 2016

Sacred Starfish Communion

Quiet Sunday morning

Just returned from mass

Gonna use my hungry tongue

To fuck her luscious ass